The first part of this article talked about how things may have affected you when you were young, and what kind of label you put on yourself as a result.

Some of us come away with courage and independence, but you may have found yourself questioning your self-worth and abilities.

No matter what you do, if you do not do it with confidence, then you will have a difficult time doing your best work, because you do not feel free enough to try new things. You don’t have the confidence to sell your ideas to yourself, let alone someone else.

I usually tell my clients that maybe a second look (inside) might not be a bad idea. Even a third look if necessary.

If you are going to be successful at what you do, then having self-confidence is a must. No one will want to hire you, be around you, or even date you (if you are in the market) if you lack self confidence. Self-confidence, or lack thereof, shows through whether you want it to or not. Why is it that people who are less qualified than you seem to get the better jobs, more attractive mates, or are more popular at parties? Self-confidence shows in personality and demeanor.

How you see yourself is not just a matter of self-confidence. Some people consider
themselves as self-confident, but don’t choose to participate in those things that
require others.

If you are an olympic swimmer, for example, you may be very confident in your ability to swim a 200 meter backstroke, but not so self-confident in your ability to converse with others, or get up and speak in front of an audience.

There are different levels and areas of expertise, and you are certainly different from other people, and have your knowledge and confidence in areas that are different from others.

I you feel that your self-confidence is lacking in almost every area of your life, then you may have a more involved set of circumstances that might be best sorted out by a professional with whom you can discuss your various issues and thoughts.

There are a few things that can be done to help control some of these difficulties, depending upon how serious the issue(s) involved.

Hypnosis is one method that has worked wonders for some people, but is not necessarily the answer for everyone. As a professional hypnotherapist, I helped a woman who had a fear of going out in public (Agoraphobia) to get back to work, shop, and lead a normal life. It is best to consult a professional to determine the best treatment for you.

Most of the problems that you find yourself faced with will have some kind of fear factor involved. Fear of uncertainty (“What do I do next?), fear of the unknown (What will happen next?), or any of the “What ifs?”, or “What will happen?

Self-confidence also lends itself to the belief that someone may be more competent then
they actually are. You may be very social, and seem confident, but yet when you try to
do something, it may not work out for you very often. This may only be do to being disorganized.

There are many reasons why some things don’t get done or accomplished, and being disorganized is certainly one of many reasons. But why do you seem to think others are just better at things than you are?

Well, THEY ARE NOT! Some people are naturally more gifted in some areas, but these people are made up of flesh and blood just like you do, they get sick just like you do, they eat the same foods that you do, and they will die just like you will (sorry for getting morbid here). The point is that we are all pretty similar. Some of us have different advantages than others, and have different abilities. If you were born into a family that was extremely wealthy (such as the Bill Gates’), then you would certainly have a different outlook on things than someone who was born in the poorest part of town.

One of the best ways to overcome your fears is to face them, deal with them, understand them, and find ways to overcome them. They won’t go away on their own, but they will go away if you don’t allow them to control your life.

It takes work to accomplish important things in your life. There will always be fears and other obstacles to your success in life, and there will always be those who can overcome those fears and obstacles to find their successes. How badly to you want to succeed?
Success does not usually find you, but you must go after it. Are you ready for success?

Everyone has heard the phrase “Time is Money”.   Wasting time is also
wasting part of your precious life.  If you are young this means little to you, but if you are getting older, then you are certainly aware of how quickly time passes.

if you are a younger person who is working hard to get ahead.  Evidence that time is fleeting is in the way the day goes by so fast, and you are still feeling like you have barely gotten anything done, or are wishing that there were a couple more hours in your day.

Time is going by whether you are doing anything productive or not. Time does not care whether you are rich or poor, young or old, male or female (or other).

Time is not your friend, nor is it your enemy. Time is just something that is here. It is a progression of sorts built into the system of life. We have set up a measuring system, we call it “Time”, and we break it up into different segments and call these segments by various names. We call short periods of time seconds and minutes. Then we have months and years. of course we also decades and millennia.

The name (Time) is not important at all. What is important is that you have only a limited quantity of it. Each of us has a certain amount of time that we are allowed to live breathe, and do things to improve our lives and the lives of others. It is what you do with the time that you have that is important.

Your relationship with time may be as important as your relationship with your family, maybe even more important. How you treat the time that you have can make you happy, or cause you endless nightmares.

It is also how you look at time. If you see time as something that you need to fight against, time will win every battle. Befriend time, use it wisely, and keep a close eye on it so that it doesn’t get away from you. You don’t want time to be that “Big Fish” that got away.

Waking up at retirement age and looking into the mirror realizing that you have wasted most of your life is something that happens all too often.

Don’t be that person. Learn how to use the time that you have to become more productive. Just a few “Tweaks” is often all that it takes to go from “Zero, to Hero”.

How Self-esteem can push you towards success.

It can be, and often is, very difficult for you and others to “Let Go”
of these negative, branded emotions, feelings, attitudes, or whatever
psychological conflict that may manifest itself in terms of emotional
habits and your behavioral responses to them.  Self-esteem suffers
under these conditions and success becomes even more difficult to achieve.

Success usually comes to you when, in spite of your inner conflicts,
you can pull together your thoughts and ideas into an organized plan
that overrides your “Branded” fears and emotions which results in
much greater self-esteem. This NEW plan then takes over and you
can now simply follow it through to its finish.

Without the belief that you can accomplish a task that might seem
“superhuman” at times, most people will never even try to make their
dreams a reality. If you are successful, it is likely that you will rate
high on the self-efficacy scales.

Everyone has doubts about their abilities,

but only a few individuals are
able to break through that barrier by finding the right combination to
unlock that mental locker containing all of those negative reminders,
and can clean that locker out. Those who are successful are able to
replace much of the negative information with positive attributes that
will continue to help them succeed for the rest of their lives.

Have you ever wondered why only the top 1% in most any field become
highly successful, while others who still work very hard find varying levels
of success? Much of this is due to how they think about themselves, their
self-esteem, and their abilities. Once you have determined that you can fail,
you have set yourself up TO fail.  

What’s the answer? Train your mind to wash out the garbage, and be self-aware
of how you REALLY are,  what  you can do, and your real self-worth, so that you
can mold your emotions and your outlook into the success that you were meant
to have all along.  

     Dump Your Trash!

Doing my best, so that
you can do yours.

Bob